Wife and Mommy

The Possibility of Everything by Hope Edelman chronicles the author’s unique journey of helping her daughter, as well as an examination of her own beliefs and life.

Edelman’s daughter, Maya, gains a new friend–an imaginary one–by the name of Dodo.  We are well-versed in imaginary friends in this house, as Cupcake currently has twenty-two “imagination friends.”  These friends are all nameless girls who are about the size of her thumb. Sometimes they ride with us in the minivan.  Or they might be on vacation at the beach.  They could be waiting for her at preschool, sleeping on the sofa, or at home with their mothers.  Other times, Cupcake doesn’t know where they are, but it’s okay since she knows they’ll be back.

Maya’s friend Dodo, however, is a different sort of imaginary friend.  His disturbing hold on Maya alarms Edelman and her husband.  Maya develops negative behaviors (hitting, tantrums, refusal to do things) that she blames on Dodo.  All the usual parenting tactics do not resolve these problems.  Edelman and her husband eventually resort to seeking out Mayan healers while they are traveling in Belize. The healers attempt to rid Maya of Dodo using ancient rituals.

I admit when I started reading this book, I rolled my eyes more than a few times.  I just couldn’t see how an imaginary friend who incited some bad behaviors in a little girl would lead otherwise stable, normal parents to take their beloved child to strange shamans in a different country.  Especially to shamans who had rituals that weren’t even understood by those parents.  It was a little too outside the box for me–as it was at first for Edelman.  But then the journey caused Edelman to open up to a whole different world of beliefs.

Me, however…well.  I put this book down several times and could not get into it.  Until last week, when my son Bito (age 6) fell ill.  He awoke one night drenched in sweat and with chills that left him shivering.  The Husband and I treated the symptoms, keeping Bito comfortable, hydrated and on an ibuprofen and Tylenol regimen.  Bito refused to eat anything, and just wanted to rest a lot (so unlike him), mostly with me snuggled up close to him.

It was during this time, immobilized on the sofa next to pitiful Bito, that I picked up The Possibility of Everything and finally dove in.  And this time it clicked.  As I looked at my feverish first-born, I realized if it were my child–my Bito or Cupcake or BabyMuffin–who was ill (spiritually or physically), I would go to great lengths to have him or her healed.  No matter if it were a far-fetched plan, was weird, sounded crazy, and caused other people to look down at me.  Of course I would.

This was reinforced the other night  when The Husband and I were watching Lost (yes, we’re Losties).  In one scene, Dogen tells Sayid about his previous life in Japan, and his son.  Dogen endangered his son’s life when they got into a car accident because he (Dogen) was drunk.  In order to save his son’s life, Dogen strikes a deal with Jacob to go to the Island and never see his boy again.

Spontaneously, I turned to The Husband and asked, “Would you do it?”  His response was immediate: “Yeah, I would.  Would you?”

What wouldn’t I do?

This post is written in response to The Possibility of Everything, the SVMoms Blog Book Club selection for March.  Members were given the book to read and discuss on our blogs.  Read more responses to the book at Silicon Valley Moms Blog.

Tags: book club